Warning: Okay - I love Jesus. But...I can cuss like a sailor and talk dirty like a porn star. Feel free to have a look around and try not to be offended - it's the way God made me and He loves me anyway!

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Sometimes My Kid is NOT Very Nice!

So...today's my birthday (don't ask - I'll never tell) and my daughter and her fiance come up to spend the day with me us.  Not necessarily cause it's my birthday - I think it's more the surprise birthday party we are going to for my best slutty, bitchy, nasty wonderful friend.  (whose birthday is tomorra and she's way older than me!)

Anyway...this afternoon she comes out with a really pretty bag and hands it to me.  I reach in and pull out a little tissue-paper wrapped gift.  "Oh no!" she says, "you have to open that one last."  Mmkay...I reach in and pull out an iTunes card (suh-weet) and a huge coffee mug talkin' 'bout respectin' the Queen (smart girl).  

Finally get to the last gift, carefully pull off the paper and find myself lookin' at a two-pack of pacifiers.  "What do I need pacifiers for?" Tryin' to figure out if this is some dig at my age or somethin' (though you'd think Depends for that before pacifiers - at least in my mind).

I look up at the daughter and she's got this really strange look on her face.  


Then she cracks up..."Ooohhh - I got you SO good!  You shoulda seen the look on your face!"  HaHa!

Daughter and fiance are pissin' themselves laughin'.

I DID NOT need any more gray hair, nor did I ask for any...

Fuckin' kids...



  1. Around here, that little stunt would end with, "You're out of the will!" It is a little funny, though! Happy Birthday!!!

  2. OMG - I am sorry but I had to laugh! That was a good one but I agree if you aren't ready for that well then it's def. a shocker!!!!!

  3. Why was I not there is my question. I would of loved to be in on that one.

  4. hahahaha, that's funny. I mean, it's not ... but it so is! Following from Momma Fargo's b/c I love your blog description! Can't wait to get to know ya.


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